Top 25 Songs Guaranteed To Make Suburbanites Dance

We have all been to one of those parties where the DJ just cannot get people away from the dessert table and onto the dance floor.

But fear not masters of the mix table, Geeky Daddy has your back!

Whether at some tech start-up holiday party in San Fransisco or a Bar Mitzvah party in the Hamptons, Geeky Daddy has assembled the…

THE TOP 25 SONGS GUARANTEED TO MAKE SUBURBANITES DANCE!

25 Old Time Rock N’ Roll – Bob Seger

You wanna get some ‘Baby Boomers’ on the dance floor? Play that Old Time Rock N’ Roll!

24 Blister In The Sun – Violent Femmes

According to SongFacts.com, Violent Femmes lead song writer Gordan Gano said “Blister in the Sun” is simply about the strung out feeling that comes from drug abuse and that it wasn’t until years later that he heard about the self-pleasuring interpretation of the lyrics.

Sure dude….sure…

23 Bohemien Rhapsody – Queen

Would this song have the same longevity if not for its use in the Wayne’s World movie? Probably not. But it was, so it is.

22 I’m Too Sexy – Right Said Fred

As soon as this song booms out of the speakers, suddenly people that have no justifiable reason to find themselves “too sexy” for anything will find themselves exactly that.

Side Note: These guys look like first place winners in a “Vin Diesel Look-A-Like” Contest years before Vin Diesel appeared on the big screen. Is this proof of time travel!?!

21 I’m Gonna Be (500 Miles) – Proclaimers

If you close your eyes and picture a musical duo that could be the Pied Pipers of leading suburbanites to the dance floor, these two dudes would come to mind.

20 You Shook Me (All Night Long) – ACDC

I’ve seen the rumor that this is “The Most Popular song played at strip clubs in the United States” on multiple sites but I have been unable to verify it in any official capacity.

Perhaps Geeky Daddy will need to do some on-site research…

19 Fight For your Right – Beastie Boys

If New York kids from the 1980’s had a theme song, this would probably be it.

18 Thrift Shop – Macklemore & Ryan Lewis

“I’m Gonna Pop Some Tags” has multiple meanings. Everything that I have read points towards Macklemore’s lyrics (and Jay-Z’s for that matter) meaning to spend gratuitously on yourself.

I grew up with “Pop Some Tags” meaning theft, in that you are swapping one price label for a cheaper price label in a store.

17 Time Warp – Rocky Horror Picture Show

I dated a girl in high school who was obsessed with this movie, which meant I became far too familiar with it then I cared to be. It is amazing what a teenage boy will endure if he thinks there may be some nookie afterwards.

I’m as big of a Tim Curry fan as the next guy, but I gotta be honest, I just don’t get the appeal of this song (or movie).

But that doesn’t stop the ladies from flooding the dance floor to this musical number whenever a DJ plays it.

16 Cotton Eye JoeRednex

Depending on who you ask, Cotton Eye Joe is either a man getting his junk swabbed for STD’s or about slavery in South.

In either case, Yikes!!! Not exactly the subject matter you’d think would spawn on of the most successful line dances of the 1990’s….

15 The Wobble – V.I.C.

Want to see 40-something suburbanites suddenly think they are cool and hip, put on the Wobble dance!

Just to prove I’m a nice guy, I found a “How To” video for the Wobble dance for your educational purposes.

14 Timber – Kesha (featuring Pitbull)

Great beat, some fun Kesha lyrics and more than a splash of Pitbull (who is like the high-fructose corn syrup of the music industry: Just add a little but of him to any track and it suddenly becomes much sweeter).

My good friend Dana loses her $#!T on the dance floor any time this song comes on!

13 Livin’ On A Prayer – Bon Jovi

Anybody seen my can of hairspray?

I often find myself wondering…How did Tommy and Gina ever make out? This song really needs a “Where Are They Now?” update.

12 Brown Eyed Girl – Van Morrison

I was in a youth group in high school and, I’m not sure if all co-ed dances were required to end with this song….but they all sure as hell did.

11 One Week – Bare Naked Ladies

Feel free to substitute pretty much any Bare Naked Ladies song here.

One Week is simply the one that came to my mind.

10 InformerSnow

Who says white Canadians can’t reggae rap?

They can….they just shouldn’t.

9 Macarena – Los Del Rio

Pretty much ‘The Hustle’ of the 1990’s, you could NOT attend a high school dance, wedding, graduation party, Bar Mitzvah, BBQ, quinceañera or pretty much anywhere that played music without people doing the Macarena.

I’m pretty sure I remember seeing people doing the Macarena while waiting to check out at a Rite-Aid once.

8 Tubthumping – Chubawamba

Full Disclosure: My opinion is probably a little inflated on this one thanks to my fond memories (or lack of memories) downing some lager drinks while cranking this song full blast on my Aiwa shelf top stereo system in the dorms in the late 1990s.

I remember one night in the dorms, we set up a Slip ‘N’ Slide in the hallway after a few too many vodka drinks which resulted in a wee bit of billable damage to the building.

Now that I put that on the internet, hopefully the statute of limitations on that is up.

(Side Note: Courtney, I love you like a sister but you were a horrible influence on Nicole and I.)

7 Dancing Queen – ABBA

Why do women like this song?

That’s not a rhetorical question, I seriously don’t understand why women like this song. But they do.

So long as Pierce Brosnan isn’t singing it anyway…

6 Baby Got Back – Sir Mix-a-Lot

We may be in the age of “body shaming” but Sir Mix-a-Lot’s classic jam about the beauty of curves on the female body has transcended generations.

5 Wannabe – Spice Girls

Part of the British invasion of the 1990s, girls went crazy over this song! I mean super crazy!

Can you believe this female version of a ‘boy band’ got so popular off this song that they got their own movie!?!

4 Pour Some Sugar On Me – Def Leppard

Their music was so good that these guys could dress like this and still get laid….A LOT!!!

So what exactly does “Pour Some Sugar on Me” mean?

Per Distractify: “The song is about urging someone you’re fond of to get nasty with you and do what you like.”

3 Sweet Caroline – Neil Diamond

Speaking of nifty shirts…

A great song for audience participation, there is no more sure fire why to get people to chant “Bahm, Bahm, Bahm” than to crank up this Neil Diamond classic

2 YMCA – The Village People

Tell the truth, did you read that song title…or sing it?

This disco classic should get the highest amount of audience participation on the dance floor.

Well, this or the Macarena depending on what decade the dancers were born in.

1 Ice Ice Baby

If you didn’t know Ice Ice Baby was going to be #1 on this list, you just don’t know suburban people.

Around the year 2000, when the Limp Bizkit inspired metal-rap craze was ruining a generation of music, Vanilla Ice released an updated metal-rap version of his iconic hit. That was also when he had a concert at Harpo’s Concert Theater in Detroit that my college roommate Ryan and I got lost on out way to. Ahhh….memories.

Anyone else remember Kentucky Fried Movie?

I do need to give Rob Van Winkle (AKA Vanilla Ice) credit. After his music career ended, he successfully pivoted into real estate management and home rehabs. He even had his own home rehab show on the DIY Network, The Vanilla Ice Project (V.I.P…get it?) where he could be seen doing much of the planning and construction work himself.

Honorable Mention: Humpty Dance – Digital Underground

The Humpty Dance only makes Honorable Mention because, although it is sure to get me out on the dance floor, it didn’t appear nearly as often as I expected it to during the research and interviews I did preparing this list.

Not sure what that says about my taste in music…

UPDATE: Since enough people have already asked, the hardest cuts were Celebrate Good Time (Kool & The Gang), Don’t Stop Believin’ (Journey), Come On Eileen (Dexys Midnight Runners), Gettin’ Giggy Wit It (Will Smith) and All About That Bass (Meghan Trainor). It was hard to keep the list down to just 25.

Well, that’s my list. What some of the songs that I may have missed that you think puts suburban butts on the dance floor?

Check out other musical list, such as The Top 5 Absolute Least Romantic Songs To Play On Valentine’s Day!

Let me know in the comments below!

As always, any Likes, Comments and Shares are greatly appreciated.

5 Comments

  1. Well done! Great list! I’d add Don’t Stop Believing as an honorable mention. I feel like making a playlist with all these songs. Ice Ice Baby forever!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. There is an update at the bottom of the article where I put the cuts that were the hardest and Don’t Stop Believin’ was there. It was hard keeping to only 25. When I started writing the list, I never thought Journey, Gettin’ Jiggy Wit It and All About That Bass would miss the cut.

      Like

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