Rapper Lil Xan Rushed To The Hospital After Eating Too Many Flamin’ Hot Cheetos

As if the world needed further proof that the music industry has gone down the crapper!

At the risk of sounded like a grumpy old man, ‘back in my day, rappers only went to the hospital for gunshot or stab wounds!’

Now rappers like Lil Xan (who I honestly have never even heard of before, but apparently is a 22-year-old ‘music artist’) are being rushed to the hospital for eating to many Flamin’ Hot Cheetos!

(I couldn’t make something this stupid up)

lil xan
Here we see Lil Xan pondering the mysteries of life…

“I guess I ate too many Hot Cheetos and it ripped something in my stomach open, so I puked a little blood,” he explained on Instagram. The health bump won’t affect his Total Xanarchy tour, which kicks off in New York City on Wednesday.

cheetos
If you see this culprit, please do not approach. Contact local law enforcement immediately!

I have no idea what kind of ‘street cred‘ this dude has, but whatever it is, it needs to be revoked faster than when Snoop Dogg teamed up with Katy Perry.

Snoop+Dogg+Katy+Perry+2010+MTV+Movie+Awards+HRXeAqzLAN3l

Seriously, Tupac was shot 5 times before he went to the hospital! Once in the groin! In the groin! And he still didn’t narc out who dun it!

tupac

If a couple stupid looking facial tattoos and naming yourself after a drug can’t toughen you up to the point where a bag of snack chips can’t take you down, it is time for a new career.

lil xan pic

Not to toot my own horn, but I’ve devoured close to my own body weight in Flamin’ Hot Cheetos and Taco Bell without any digestive problems. And believe me, I’m no tough guy.

 

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1 Comment

  1. Actually, Flamin’ Hot Cheetos have been found to cause diverticulitis in some, especially the young -and that shit’s no joke. Painful 🤷‍♀️

    Like

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